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Posted: Begin Nov 2001
|This little contest is also found in the strange story of
the Birth of the KinkyWeb. You can find it at 27 Oct (Part III of that
Because I like this story I repost it as a separate story.
|Tringg, the doorbell goes. Reinko stops typing and opens
the door. It's Arty again! "Hey come in man! How is life?"
Arty says: "Hey hush man, I did some emailing around and Osama said it was ok if you did not make any jokes about his nose!"
Reinko says: "What are you talking about?? What is ok?"
Arty says: "You did not read my email I guess, well we just play some little contest about who is the biggest terrorist! So it is the East against the West!"
Reinko says: "Ok, let's do it!"
And Arty is the ceremonial master&referee; he starts talking: "Ladies and gentlemen may I have your attention please, from the East we have Osama bin Ladin (also called Binnie Boy) and from the West we have Reinko (now he is dressed as Evil Bert for this contest only). So it is Binnie Boy on the right against Reinko dressed as Evil Bert on the left of the pic!"
|Arty says: "Ok gentlemen, you have to name some
recent work and I will give you your points, you can name 3 recent
works. Osama can you start?"
Osama says: "I would like to fly my bombings of the American embassy in Africa into this contest please."
Reinko thinks 'Shit, that's heavy, shall I bring in my joker or not?'
Reinko says: "I have made some AxeOfMassiveMullahDistruction, and I like to fly this into our little contest!"
Arty says: "It is clear to me, zero points for Reinko and two points for Binnie Boy! Ok, what's next Osama?"
Osama says: "I would like to bring under the attention of my honored audience the USS Cole!"
Reinko says: "And I throw in my IQ 43 joke on the NotATreeFigure!"
Arty says: "Wow wow wow, that is hard to decide, both things work fine so you get each one point! Now it is 3 to 1 and Osama is leading. Next one please?"
Osama says: "I paid for the WTC shit, so Reinko what do you have?"
Reinko says: "I want to throw in my Arty comes out of the Void story, it's my story so you don't get the copy rights Osama!" (Reinko is a bit pissed because Osama gets all the credits&attention lately...)
Arty says: "Difficult, difficult again, Osama paid some bucks and Reinko did write some story. Ok, ok both men 1 point again! We are at the end of this contest, Osama has 4 points and Reinko only 2. So Reinko is the loser on this and Binnie Boy has won the contest."
And so the GoldenHandGrenade goes to Binnie Boy and the SilverAxe goes to Reinko. The two men shake hands and they decide to co to some café down the street.
In the café Reinko orders for some big beer and Osama likes some Virginia grown tea.
Osama says: "He Reinko, that massive Mullah axe was some thing. You really shook 'em up with that. But they don't want you dead, even some order has gone out to give you protection when you need it!"
Reinko says: "Wow, that's nice! I also have some protection from the Americans&stuff like that. I like it! But Osama tell me, shall I turn to the Muslim faith?"
Osama says: "Turn to the Muslim faith? Why do you want to do that boy??"
Reinko says: "Well, you have two FATWA's already and I would like to have some for myself! You know, a FATWA a day keeps the doctor away!"
Osama says: "I don't think it would be a wise thing to do, the FATWA's always bring a lot of trouble around. But you can try if you want to, somehow I got the impression the Mullahs won't look into your request so you will have some trouble before your first FATWA is there."
Reinko says: "Well, with a bit of luck I will succeed in collecting some FATWA stuff myself. He, I got to go to some place and you must go back to the mountains. See you next time!"
So they said goodbye and stuff like that and with a flush both men were gone and some BigWind was following them. The BigWind felt like some ThunderStorm and after the storm there was silence. Only silence.
End of story.